This is tongue in cheek, naturally. Though Magnus Carlsen is on a 17-game winless streak, he wouldn't have any trouble winning games against the likes of someone like me. That "battle" is unlikely to occur any time soon though, so if you want to have a "Carlsen wins!" fix, you can take a look at my video of a fascinating game he played when he was 13 against GM Leonid Yurtaev. The video will be available on demand for the next two weeks, for free, to ChessLecture.com members. (You can create a free membership if you don't already have one.)